I like a vacuum inside today. A big ball of emotion that just will not leave. I want to spit as far as possible. Spitting the negative emotion that feels tight inside me. Who eats me up inside to reach my brain and give me the impression that the pain of living. A good cry. Howl a while. Just take out the bad. Not that it goes wrong in my life. Far from it. My little chip is well. She smiles and coos. It fills me with joy every time. She made her nights, 10-12 hours online. Since its 6th week of life. A pure delight to be able to sleep without interruption. My Lovely fills me with joy. It is present and makes me feel good. I'm not locked up 24 hours on 24 as some new mothers. I go out, I'll visit my friends and my family. So why this pain inside me? Why this new sensitivity to the news on TV? Why the fate of others affect me more. Not that he does not touched me before, but even more today. I do not watch more television in the same way. Neither film which combines violence and hatred. I do not read newspapers as before. Also more detached. More connected to reality. It pogne me in the guts. I am more sensitive to people around me, most affected by the sun that warms me, the wind that feels so good. Is it that, becoming a mother? Log in even more on our emotions. Already as women, we are linked directly to our heart, can we really be better? It seems to me that so difficult to manage ... ...
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